the Pleasure Chest

Friends, Neighbors, families,

Beware....
the sex shop is coming to our neighborhood!

That is the text of a letter
I received today, rubber-banded to
my doorknob like so many Asian menus.

It's not word for word,
but you get the gist.

The people of my community are upset,
and holding a meeting at the local library,
because "The Pleasure Chest" is opening,
right here on Lincoln Avenue.

Spitting distance from my apartment.

Right next to the liquor store that has been there for years.

Right across the street from the "Be-By-Baby"
healthy new-mother shop.

I think it's perfect.

Hip, young, attractive couples can move into
their fancy new condos in Roscoe Village,
pick up a bottle of wine and a dildo,
then shop for Baby Bjorn's and
hemp diapers to deal with their results.

The Pleasure Chest is not a dark-cornered
slut-shop with dripping video booths.

It is a well-lit, couples oriented sex shop,
toys, games, and literature for the desiring mind.

If "Be-By-Baby" can help couples cope
with their offspring, why can't the Pleasure
Chest help to make them?

The meeting is at the library tomorrow night,
I wish so badly that I could attend, but I have
to go play in Indiana. It better be a good fucking show,
cause I have a feeling I'm missing a good fucking meeting.

I have fantasies of showing up with
my 16 inch rubber penis, (the "Rambone")
and making people pass it around as
a talking stick.

Long live the Pleasure Chest.

-p